my first encounter with euthanasia...

even though i've had many pets, i've never actually went to the vet to have them humanely euthanized... i've always said my goodbyes at home...

when i first started working as a vet tech, i encountered a four week old kitten that had both its back legs broken... the family who brought her in didn't know she was behind their car when they backed out and sadly they caught her back legs under the tire... fortunately they were kind enough to bring her in and wanted to help her in any way they could... 

what made the situation hard was that her breaks were up high- near the pelvis... so we had a difficult time trying to make splints that would stay in place... we dubbed her "pants" because after the splinting and bandaging, it looked like she was wearing pants... 

a couple of days later, the family came back with the kitten and said that all the bandaging had come off... me being a tad bit naive and optimistic, i told them that it wouldn't be a problem and that we would just wrap her up again... the father looked at me and told me that the big problem was the bone was sticking out of one of her legs... 

as one of my favorite vets that i worked with looked her over, she sadly said that euthanasia would be the proper thing to do... there was a three thousand dollar surgery option but it was no guarantee and the kitten would spend a lot of time rehabilitating... 

it broke my heart because she was so tiny... so adorable... and as we gave her her last meal, she ate away heartily because, well, she was a happy, healthy kitten despite her broken legs... 

at the time, to me euthanasia meant that the animal was sick and looked sick and it was time for the animal to go... i never thought that i would see a healthy, lively, happy kitten be put to sleep... 

i held the kitten as it meowed at me in her tiny voice and looked up at me with her big, round, grey eyes... and she slowly drifted off to sleep... 

i was mad at myself afterwards because i was wishing so hard that i had the money to pay for the surgery required... that's when the vet told me that surgery was no guarantee and what we did was best for her and that at least she had a good meal, loving strokes, and kind words spoken to her before she left...